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Friday Confessional: Public Bathrooms

pubtoiAlright, I have many neurosis, but I hate public restrooms. Most of you do, too, but not to the extent that I do. It’s not that I “can’t go” or anything like that.

I’m shy. That’s right. I’m shy.

I listen when you pee and I know you listen, too. Don’t pretend you don’t. It happens. There was one time an elderly woman was in the stall next to me making such serious fireworks that I snorted while I laughed. I couldn’t help it.

I’m immature, but it was hilarious.

So, when you sit in the stall next to me, I freeze up.

And here’s what I do.

I count to 13. Slowly.

I have no idea why it works, but it does. If I can count to 13, I can pee. It’s not the most compelling confession, but there you have it.

Jillian

13 Comments

  1. dee says:

    You know what I do? I use the handicapped stall so I don’t have to be so close to the germy walls. I also flush the toilet with my foot and once broke a handle off. That felt good to get out.

  2. Joanna says:

    If possible I don’t go right next to someone. I am worse than you I feel like the crack’s are huge in the door I feel like people can see me and you can a bit. It’s just awkward!

    Your blog cracks me up keep on posting!

  3. Jillian says:

    @dee You broke the handle off? That’s hardcore.

    @Joanna Why thank you! Stay around! :) I post Mon-Fri.

  4. Ashley says:

    Hey I popped over from Mamapedia (great article) and this post is too funny. I too hate the public restroom, more because I feel like an idiot that I giggle when someone lets ‘er rip. I may be 26 on paper but I’ve pretty much left my sense of humour in 3rd Grade.

  5. Jillian says:

    @Ashley Hey, thanks for coming by. And you know that when we giggle we make that person stop faster than anything. ;)

  6. Eileen says:

    Maybe it’s your character. I must say you have a great sense of humour! XD

  7. Jillian says:

    Eileen, that is so sweet. I needed to hear that today. Thank you.

  8. Natalie says:

    oh thank goodness I am not the only one who ever broke off the handle of a toilet with my foot!

  9. Jillian says:

    @Natalie You’re kidding, right?

  10. Kath Lockett says:

    I used to be shy but then I figured that hey we’re all in there for the same reason – drops or plops!

    Make a noise, rustle some paper and be PROUD!

  11. Jillian says:

    AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA. Well done, Kath!

  12. boingerhead says:

    Jill, for real. I can use a bathroom without touching anything except with my shoes. I broke the handle on the toilet in spectacular fashion – I lost my balance and fell out of the stall, hit my head on the sink and scared the bejeezus out of the old lady rinsing her dentures.

  13. Jillian says:

    *chuckling* Natalie, what I wouldn’t give for camera footage of that event.

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About Me
Life is like a game. We all have challenges, thoughts, opinions and beliefs. Often, it feels like something out there, life, karma, catty people, or blue shells (for the Kart lovers), seeks to bring us down. Luckily, we always get up. This is where I wear my heart on my sleeve and my foot in my mouth.
Contact me

jillian@blueshelled.com
P.O. Box 252, Franklin, TN 37064

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