Friday Confessional: Public Bathrooms

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . October 16, 2009 . 11:20AM

Alright, I have many neurosis, but I hate public restrooms. Most of you do, too, but not to the extent that I do. It’s not that I “can’t go” or anything like that.

I’m shy. That’s right. I’m shy.

I listen when you pee and I know you listen, too. Don’t pretend you don’t. It happens. There was one time an elderly woman was in the stall next to me making such serious fireworks that I snorted while I laughed. I couldn’t help it.

I’m immature, but it was hilarious.

So, when you sit in the stall next to me, I freeze up.

And here’s what I do.

I count to 13. Slowly.

I have no idea why it works, but it does. If I can count to 13, I can pee. It’s not the most compelling confession, but there you have it.

Filed under: confessions | Tags: confessions, friday confessional, friday confessionals, public peeing, public restrooms

13 Comments

dee says:

October 16, 2009 at 11:53 am

You know what I do? I use the handicapped stall so I don’t have to be so close to the germy walls. I also flush the toilet with my foot and once broke a handle off. That felt good to get out.
Joanna says:

October 16, 2009 at 2:15 pm

If possible I don’t go right next to someone. I am worse than you I feel like the crack’s are huge in the door I feel like people can see me and you can a bit. It’s just awkward!

Your blog cracks me up keep on posting!
Jillian says:

October 16, 2009 at 6:22 pm

@dee You broke the handle off? That’s hardcore.

@Joanna Why thank you! Stay around! I post Mon-Fri.
Ashley says:

October 17, 2009 at 3:17 pm

Hey I popped over from Mamapedia (great article) and this post is too funny. I too hate the public restroom, more because I feel like an idiot that I giggle when someone lets ‘er rip. I may be 26 on paper but I’ve pretty much left my sense of humour in 3rd Grade.
Jillian says:

October 17, 2009 at 6:06 pm

@Ashley Hey, thanks for coming by. And you know that when we giggle we make that person stop faster than anything.
Eileen says:

October 18, 2009 at 9:36 pm

Maybe it’s your character. I must say you have a great sense of humour! XD
Jillian says:

October 18, 2009 at 9:37 pm

Eileen, that is so sweet. I needed to hear that today. Thank you.
Natalie says:

October 18, 2009 at 10:14 pm

oh thank goodness I am not the only one who ever broke off the handle of a toilet with my foot!
Jillian says:

October 18, 2009 at 10:15 pm

@Natalie You’re kidding, right?
Kath Lockett says:

October 18, 2009 at 11:11 pm

I used to be shy but then I figured that hey we’re all in there for the same reason – drops or plops!

Make a noise, rustle some paper and be PROUD!
Jillian says:

October 18, 2009 at 11:12 pm

AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA. Well done, Kath!
boingerhead says:

October 19, 2009 at 2:48 pm

Jill, for real. I can use a bathroom without touching anything except with my shoes. I broke the handle on the toilet in spectacular fashion – I lost my balance and fell out of the stall, hit my head on the sink and scared the bejeezus out of the old lady rinsing her dentures.
Jillian says:

October 19, 2009 at 2:49 pm

*chuckling* Natalie, what I wouldn’t give for camera footage of that event.

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