And I want to thank you

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . November 25, 2009 . 10:48PM

However, it is impossible to express what is in my heart adequately to those that have supported me all these years or for those who have supported me for just today. I don’t know how to say thank you in a way that conveys what I really mean to my friends who have been there for me all of my life and those who have just come into my life, in a time of great turmoil and are surely confused by the tornado I call a life.

How is it possible to give adequate thanks for all the good events and the bad that shape a life?

Thank you.

Jewel has a song in which she says “In the end, only kindness matters.” I believe that is true. I have a hard time living kind, but I experienced kindness today and I want to express my gratitude.

I hobbled into the gas station and slowly walked around the store and gathered my items. My nose was red and I was shivering. Leon and AJ were still out in Leon’s car and I was trying to be quick so we could get on the road to head to my mother’s house for Thanksgiving.

I filled my arms and walked to the cash register. As I placed the items slowly onto the counter, the cashier finished her conversation with her co-worker and turned to see what I was buying.

Orange Juice.
Halls cough drops.
A single pack of Dayquil cold and flu.
Carmex lip balm.
and Starburst fave reds (which I hoped I would be able to taste and ended up not even opening).

She looked at me with kind eyes and I didn’t say anything as I saw them fill with pity. “Aw, you must be feeling crummy, aren’t you, honey. Feeling sick?” I nodded and said that yes, I was, and thanked her for asking. As I was leaving, she said, “I sure hope you feel better soon.”

I thanked her again and got into the car for the long ride in which I slept deeply.

That small act of kindness–acknowledging that I felt bad and wishing that I felt better–made me feel better than I had in days. The one on one connection with a stranger that reminds us that we are not alone.

I am thankful, indeed.

Happy Thanksgiving.