Hard to find the words

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . December 12, 2009 . 2:13PM

Last night, I lay in bed for a long time and tried to think about writing this post and all the things that I wanted to say. It rarely happens, but the words aren’t there. 13 years ago I lost someone that was special on many levels to me. I thought I was ready to talk about it, but clearly it’s not the case because I’m generally quite open on here and this is something that I feel the need to hide and protect.

So, instead of telling you how I feel, I’m going to show you the pin he gave me a long, long time ago. It was important to him and through over 10 moves, it’s one of the few things I haven’t lost. Sometimes the heart has trouble letting go. I held the pin for hours last night trying to decide what to say to all of you. Instead, I said it to him.