Book Review “The Crossroads Cafe” by Deborah Smith

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . June 14, 2010 . 4:25AM

Well, I can’t be nice all the time. This is going to be one of those times I can’t endorse something with everything I’ve got. I’m the type of person that can go through 3-4 books in a week easily, but when I picked up The CrossRoads Cafe by Deborah Smith , I labored over reading it for a solid 3 weeks. I’d take it a little bit at a time and get exhausted by the need to try to care about the characters so much that I’d put it down and walk away from it. I literally couldn’t wait to finish it. And then the dread about the review came to me and I got sad because I really wanted to like this book.

The premise is good: Take two heavily flawed characters, a 9/11 dad who lost his wife and son and a movie star who lost her looks, and put them in a situation where they need each other to emotionally survive. Throw in a cartoonish cast of characters as a supporting cast, along with a villainous ex-sister in law and you have a recipe for…exhaustion.

Here is why it didn’t work for me: I have my own problems. I didn’t care about Thomas or Cathy in any way that meant anything to me. This is a flaw in the writing that caught me over and over and over again. Thomas could have been a heart-wrenching character but he was written in such a stereotypical way that I predicted his behavior repeatedly and was bored enough to want him to go away. Cathy is just shallow enough to make you want to hit her with her good arm. Their situations are tragic. There is no doubt about that. The writing didn’t support the situations and their characters were not developed to the point where I wanted to see them succeed nor did I care that they did.

As one of the characters noted, in paraphrase here, we all carry our own scars. Right now, mine are pretty heavy. I just wanted Thomas and Cathy to get over it and move on. It took too long to move them forward and the jumping back and forth felt inauthentic to me. The book itself felt about 100 pages too long.

*Disclosure: I received a free copy of this book in order to review it. Thanks for allowing me to read this book and share my thoughts on it with others!

For love of a child, Dominick’s Law

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . June 11, 2010 . 7:21PM

From the time he was born, I have never taken my son for granted. His specialness was not lost on me when I looked into those royal blue eyes that would eventually turn a chestnut brown. He could make the people around him perform like circus animals. The night he was born I lay awake watching him sleep and then, when the nurses took him to the nursery so I could rest, I cried for hours because I feared what the world would throw at this child and how he would respond. What would he face? How would I keep him safe? How would others treat him and how could I protect him?

AJ and I have a special bond. Even at 9, he longs to spend time with me every day. I’ve been sick recently and can’t go up and down the steps. He’s been sleeping in my bed to make sure I don’t need anything in the middle of the night. As I read my book, due to my insomnia, I notice that he will roll towards me and reach his little hand out so he can hold my hand while he sleeps. When he wakes up and notices that I’m there, he smiles a sleepy smile and says in a surprised voice, “I love you, Mama” and rolls back into that deep eyed slumber that involves him giggling in his sleep and talking to whatever person is entertaining him in dream world.

Because my mama bear instinct for this little one is so strong, it gives me an ache I can’t describe when I read about mothers that don’t have that instinct or that can’t follow through in protecting their children. Recently, my friend Natalie wrote about Dominick Calhoun and his tragic death after being beaten to death over the course of a weekend in April. Dominick was beaten and tortured for days for wetting his pants by his mother’s boyfriend, Brandon Hayes. His mother had left the house during the beatings and did nothing. Natalie has the ability to feel some compassion for the mother and I love her for the amazing amount of love she has in her heart. I’m of the opposite side of this response in that a mother had an entire weekend to save her child and she did nothing. Regardless of fear, at some point, instinct to save your child has to take over, doesn’t it?

Dominick’s family, minus his mother, are working hard to enact Dominick’s Law which would increase the penalties for child abusers. The family has a facebook page that addresses the process of passing the bill and what the bill entails.

So, now we mourn the passing of Dominick and, as a mother, I fear more for my child. The idea that someone I could trust could hurt my child sends fear through me. The one thing I know is that I will die before I knowingly let it happen. Tonight, when he stretches out his hand, I’ll hold it just a little bit tighter.

Heartbroken but not lost

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . June 7, 2010 . 10:53PM

The premise of this blog is that life moves on even though circumstance will try to take you down. The last several months have been a challenge, to say the least, and this weekend, in particular, was trying. I’m surrounded by good people, though, and I continue to remind myself that life will continue on even though it feels like everything ends at each particular point in time that I struggle.

I spent some time this evening reflecting and pushing myself out of my comfort zone and letting myself talk to others and be myself again and what I realized is that my struggle is not singular. If I’m having a bad weekend, someone else reading this is struggling as well. I want you to know that even if your heart is breaking, your body is aching, your mind feels lost and you feel fragile…you are not alone and someone cares deeply for you. The things that happen are hard and heart-breaking and stunning, but they are not the end for you.

Continue to grow and love and move forward. I’m going to try to do the same along with you.