Baby on Board: Or how car accidents are caused by outdated trends

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . June 2, 2009 . 2:55PM

The other day, I happened to be driving to work and was enjoying the morning. The rain that had been greeting us every day for the last several weeks had cleared, the sun was shining brightly, the clouds looked like the ones you see in children’s books (fluffy and round) and the weather was a perfect 72 degrees.

There are two things that are not a secret to anyone that knows me even a little bit:

1/I’m not a morning person. Really. I can’t even fake it when I give it the old college try.
2/I am prone to road rage when I feel like someone is a stupid driver. No, I don’t run people down or flip them off, but I will rant at them within the confines of my own car and it won’t be pretty, loving words.

However, this particular morning, I was feeling great. I was drinking my water and appreciating that I have the privilege of driving along a road that is almost entirely lined with trees for 20 minutes straight to go to a job I love with all of my heart and that I actually look forward to each and every time I go there. Life was good and I was happy.

Until…BABY ON BOARD!!!!! ALERT!!!! THERE IS A BABY IN THIS CAR!!! What this means is that I will frequently brake and jerk my car and you will be responsible for HARMING MY CHILD!!!! should you hit this car. I will weave in and out of a two-lane road and I may, without warning, brake for no reason! And you won’t know about it because my baby on board sign will be blocking the brake light in the back windshield and the brake lights will also be obscured by the sunshine! So, it will be an utter crapshoot as to when this will happen.

My good mood waned and irritation set in as it took everything I had not to use my cell phone light to start morse coding this person that her baby on board sign was blocking the only means I had to keep from driving directly into her trunk. I was carefully keeping my distance, but when I say this person was driving erratically, that is an understatement. I don’t know what the laws are about blocking that brake light, if there are any, but I know that it made driving near her (I’m assuming it was a her, but it could have been a man), very, very difficult.

Luckily, after about 10 minutes of this, she and baby drove off to irritate other drivers and I could proceed on to work. My good mood returned and the day turned out to be another fantastic one.

A more clever baby on board sign

I have to admit, though, if I’m being honest, that she may have conditioned me that people that use those signs have issues. If you want me to believe you care about your child, skip the sign and drive like YOU care about your child. Worry less about me and more about yourself.

Parental sportsmanship under strong duress

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . May 8, 2009 . 9:30AM

Ok, ok, ok.

I admit it.

I like watching my son play Little League ball.

I more than like it.

I may be addicted.

For the last week, it’s been raining cats, dogs, iguanas and banana popsicles where I live. What that means is that my poor little boy has not been able to play his baseball and his poor parents have been missing their socialization time. It’s not something the league advertises; It’s simply a perk of being the parent of a talented little player. You become part of the screaming, yelling, slowly losing their sportsmanlike behavior exhibiting pack of hyenas known as Ball parents.

We’re the ones that make the poor high school Umps wish they’d taken that job at the Baskin Robbins. We love our kids and it’s almost impossible to tone down those Mama Bear instincts. I’m not saying we don’t try, but what you have to remember is that, if our kid is in a sport, chances are that one or both of his or her parents were in a sport. It’s hard to turn off that team spirit aka the “argue button.”

I first realized this was a problem for me when AJ played basketball. Out of nowhere, the words would come flying out of my mouth. “C’mon Ref! How come you didn’t call that?” The refs at the local Y didn’t appreciate that as it’s supposed to be a place motivated by the love of Christ. I was motivated by…look, he was BLIND! Couldn’t he see it was a foul?! You get the picture.

Baseball is much better for me. I played basketball for only a year, but softball for 8. To say I love everything about the sport is an understatement and having AJ play baseball is awesome for both of us because Leon played baseball as well. We don’t care about him winning, we just want him to do his best.

I just lied. To you.

I want him to skunk the soup out of those other little boys. I want them to run after his hits and overthrow his bases. I want him to raise his hands and jump on the bases and I’ll even let him twirl on third like he did last week (please don’t ask). I am FAR too competitive and I’m aware of my fault.

Baseball has been gone for a week. Little league is better than the majors, in my opinion. I miss it so much that I was tempted to pick a fight in the grocery store tonight just so I could ask someone if they were blind. With my luck, I’d pick on the one blind person in the store.

Come back, little league. I need other parents that understand and an outlet for my aggression.

Death by Nuggets: Childhood obesity fueled by negligent parents

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . May 7, 2009 . 6:11PM

Never once have I pretended that I know everything about having a healthy body. It has only been a recent development in my life that I care what I choose to nourish my body and the way that I view it. I willingly admit that I have not always made the best decisions where my body was concerned and there were times that I should have said no to the french friends and yes to the fruits where AJ was concerned. With that said, I still feel perfectly fine saying that, when I read this article in the Mail Online, I was pretty floored, and not in that happy excited way that I get when I find a new coach purse (more later on my designer tastes while being stingy with my money). No, this was a different feeling. It was anger mixed with contempt. I admit that I judged this woman.

Here’s why: I have no idea how big 30 stone is. I don’t care if you are 2 stone, 30 stone or 3000 stone. Because I don’t know what that means and I’m too lazy to look it up, it suddenly becomes irrelevant to my story. What is relevant is that the woman, presumably she of the 30 stones, is nourishing her children with McDonald’s at 6 months old.

I’ll wait for your shock and awe to pass. Look, there may be some extenuating circumstances that I don’t know about and I’m prepared for that. If there is something I don’t understand, someone contact me and I can say I’m wrong. Check back for the edit and it may eventually be here. I doubt it, but maybe. However, as a mom, I feel like this is pretty irresponsible.

Within the article, it notes that the babies consume about 1,250 calories a day. Listen, I don’t talk about my lifestyle changes a lot here, but I don’t consume much more than that. I’m close to 6′ tall. I’m a large woman. These are infants. 8 months old. Most 8 month olds cannot even walk, so it’s not as if they are burning calories. This cannot bode well for these children. How is this not considered child abuse?

Studies have shown that children who are obese that have an obese parent have a 79% chance of being obese as an adult (Whitaker, et. al, 1997). What do you think the opportunities are for these children to avoid heart related illness?

As parents, we are called required to be diligent in how we teach our children to make choices about their bodies. There is a reason they use the word “neglect.” It’s negligent to give a child who is still developing nothing but this junk. In the last 4 months, I’ve watched AJ change his way of thinking about food. He’s still able to eat the “good stuff” now and then, but he doesn’t live on it. Since then, he’s been sick much, much less. He doesn’t get winded as easily. He’s a happier person. I’m not saying you have to be thin to be happy. I’m saying, give your children the choice of whether or not they want to have high cholesterol or other heart related issues. Don’t force it on them due to your own laziness and neglect.

Citations:
Whitaker, R.C., Wright, J.A., Pepe, M.S., Seidel, K.D., & Dietz, W.H. (1997). Predicting obesity in young adulthood from childhood and parental obesity. The New England Journal of Medicine. 337(13), 869-873.