by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . October 30, 2009 . 1:42PM
This is a mini-confessional, but it’s a whopper and one I fully expect to hear about for years, so it gets its own post.
When I have to drink a lot water, and we all should, quite frequently, I do something odd: I pretend. I don’t just pretend that I have to drink water or I’ll die (duh!). No…
It’s more complex than that.
I close my eyes…
lift the bottle…
and as I tip it and hear it glug glug glug towards my throat…
I pretend I’m a human water cooler.
I can drink a full-sized bottle of water in about 15 seconds or less in this fashion. For someone who isn’t a water drinker, this has been the best possible use of my imagination.
What? Water is good for you. And so is playing pretend.
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by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . October 2, 2009 . 9:19AM
I don’t know how to let him go. He’s not a baby anymore and it’s becoming more and more apparent that he’s growing up.
I remember the terror I felt the first time I realized that he no longer had the baby scent.
And then the first time he smelled. I mean really smelled. As in “go take a shower you smell.”
And the first time he actually met my mouth instead of my chin or my nose when he gave me a kiss.
And all the small things that I find myself now terrified of losing: his hand when he crosses the street, the goodnight kisses, when he falls asleep in our bed–his little hand searching for my shoulder and the sweet smiles in his sleep when I say his name and tell him I love him, the first time he’s embarrassed when I tell him I love him in front of his friends, or the first time he doesn’t rush to greet me when he comes home from school.
Every stage of his life has been my favorite. He’s my favorite. He’s always been my favorite. No one makes me laugh as hard as him. He has my sense of humor. Of course I’m going to think he’s hilarious. He’s thoughtful and serious and sensitive and laughs at fart jokes because they are hysterical. They are. I don’t care what you think. THEY ARE HYSTERICAL. Prudes.
I don’t know how to let him go. But I will because I love him with quiet desperation and care. And the day will come when he has to let me go, too. Loving someone means that you will eventually feel the loss that comes with letting go. And I’m scared to death.
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A.J.,Aging,confessions,grief,Heartstrings,love,moving on,My family,parenting | Tags:
confessional,
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letting go of a child
by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . August 28, 2009 . 1:07PM
I have a bunch of small confessions that don’t warrant full entries, but are still confessions, nonetheless.
I hate mayonnaise.
I’ve never had the chicken pox. I’ve been vaccinated. Yay. I think.
Mail makes me inordinately happy. Especially packages. And my birthday is coming up. Ahem.
I often stay up to see if there is a potential woot-off on woot.
If I get a bad waitress at a restaurant, it will ruin my whole experience.
New car scent is awesome. I’ve also heard it can give you cancer, which may or may not be true.
If someone tries to bring food in my car, I will harangue them until they never want to ride in my car again.
I think that’s enough for now. That’s more than any of you wanted to know today, right?
Happy Friday!
Now, tell me YOUR secrets.