Generosity in Children

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . May 22, 2010 . 8:55PM

Often, as adults, it is easy for us to forget how generous in spirit children are when left to their own devises and without the interference of us “well meaning adults.” Our influence upon them can suck the beauty and kindness straight out of those amazing little souls faster than anything I’ve ever seen in my life. Our disapproval, anger, anxiety and upset can shake them to their core and cause them to look upon the world with distrust and unease. It then becomes a place of distraction. A place where everyone is on their own and should take care of themselves instead of looking out for the interest of others. A place where their true goodness is hidden and they lose the innocence and humanity that they seem to have from such a very young age, instinctually.

However, it flickers. Oh, how it flickers. Like a flame just looking for a little encouragement to grow, it flickers and sparks and waits for the opportunity to shine. Unlike many adults, children don’t necessarily need to shine in front of others or with the purpose of recognition, or even allow their flame to grow at all. Sometimes, they just flame away without even thinking about it and move on. Such simple love and kindness.

I’ve seen this happen repeatedly in my life. Often during my time with my son and his friends and during my time in the school system. A few weeks ago, I saw it during a warm evening at the ballpark.

I was standing in line for one of the forty or so gatorades I buy every year at the concession stand when I saw him: the blonde little boy in front of me who was patiently waiting his turn. He couldn’t have been more than 8, at most, and was clutching three dollars. It was a school night and his eyes looked tired and sad. It was approaching 9 and he must have been at one of the early games and stayed for a sibling game.

I saw his eyes scan the menu. Hamburgers, Chicken (our stand serves Chik-fil-a!), hot dogs, french fries, sodas, energy drinks and many various candies. His little blonde head nodded slightly downward as he looked at the canisters in the front of the stand. Air heads, $0.25. Ring pops, $0.75. Tips for good service, please. Condiments. Napkins. Forks.

He looked carefully back to the menu and then to the canisters again and softly said, “French Fries, please.” The boy at the counter said, “Sure, kid. Anything else?” The little boy looked down at the canisters again, looking hard at the ring pops, and I saw him swallow. “No, no thank you.” He handed the concession stand worker his two dollars and waited for his french fries. They came promptly. He smiled, said thank you and deposited his $1 in the tip canister.

Generosity of spirit can be found in the most unexpected places. I am a lucky woman to find it in so many.

More Mapco love

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . April 14, 2010 . 2:38PM

I know you may be tired of hearing how much I love my Mapco. I promise they don’t sponsor my blog, but if they did, I’d shout it even more. One of the advertising folks over there read the post about Bryan and my 1am adventure and sent me a very sweet note and a gas card as a thank you. It made my day. I’d post the note, but my phone camera just isn’t that great. It looks gorgeous, but doesn’t like Times New Roman. And my Mapco now has a Quiznos which means I can get my ham and swiss EVERY DAY. I love them. And they aren’t paying me to say that. I LOVE THEM. I believe in rewarding places that are clean, nice, well-stocked and helpful to me when I’m there. It’s capitalism, people! And now that they were more nice to me, I’ll go there even more often. Yes, I will.

Lately, I’ve had a lot of time to think and what I think is that being kind is underrated. The simple things in day to day life are making or breaking me the last couple of weeks and a nice word or gesture is really all it takes to salvage a day.

What I’ve also realized is that the little things in life that make a person miserable aren’t worth it and if something is toxic that it needs to be cut out like a boil. If you constantly find yourself feeling a certain way about a certain thing, a certain idea, or a certain person that makes you feel bad or unhappy, then, as painful as that is, sometimes you have to let go. Especially if you feel like you can’t confront the feeling head-on or support the person as they are.

But mainly, kindness is really really important. And if someone isn’t kind to you in your darkest of moments, move on. And when a gas company is, support them.

People are kind

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . May 24, 2009 . 1:35PM

Despite all the nastiness going on in the world, I truly believe people are kind. I’ll wait while you nail me in comments for my naivete. My friends, who have my interests at heart, often remind me of this with warnings and chiding. However, when it comes down to it, I think that people want to help others succeed, especially when they don’t feel threatened by that person in any way. I wanted to thank Smitty, who posts over at the Other McCain, for the kind Hat Tip, which may have led some of you here. And if any of you link to me in any way, or add me to your blogroll, let me know, so that I may return the favor. It means a lot to me and I am a fan of karma and kindness.