by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . October 7, 2010 . 1:29AM
In black for three,
in black for three,
in black for three,
Come back for me.
I wait for thee,
and wait for thee,
and wait for thee.
Still for thee.
I pray for thee,
oft in sorrow,
in black for three.
Written by me for her
by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . June 7, 2010 . 10:53PM
The premise of this blog is that life moves on even though circumstance will try to take you down. The last several months have been a challenge, to say the least, and this weekend, in particular, was trying. I’m surrounded by good people, though, and I continue to remind myself that life will continue on even though it feels like everything ends at each particular point in time that I struggle.
I spent some time this evening reflecting and pushing myself out of my comfort zone and letting myself talk to others and be myself again and what I realized is that my struggle is not singular. If I’m having a bad weekend, someone else reading this is struggling as well. I want you to know that even if your heart is breaking, your body is aching, your mind feels lost and you feel fragile…you are not alone and someone cares deeply for you. The things that happen are hard and heart-breaking and stunning, but they are not the end for you.
Continue to grow and love and move forward. I’m going to try to do the same along with you.
by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . December 12, 2009 . 2:13PM
Last night, I lay in bed for a long time and tried to think about writing this post and all the things that I wanted to say. It rarely happens, but the words aren’t there. 13 years ago I lost someone that was special on many levels to me. I thought I was ready to talk about it, but clearly it’s not the case because I’m generally quite open on here and this is something that I feel the need to hide and protect.
So, instead of telling you how I feel, I’m going to show you the pin he gave me a long, long time ago. It was important to him and through over 10 moves, it’s one of the few things I haven’t lost. Sometimes the heart has trouble letting go. I held the pin for hours last night trying to decide what to say to all of you. Instead, I said it to him.
Your Lucy still misses you so much. I'm still not able to let go.
Life is like a game. We all have challenges, thoughts, opinions and beliefs. Often, it feels like something out there, life, karma, catty people, or blue shells (for the Kart lovers), seeks to bring us down. Luckily, we always get up. This is where I wear my heart on my sleeve and my foot in my mouth.
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