Southern hospitality from a Northerners perspective

by Jillian @ http://blueshelled.com . June 22, 2009 . 1:42PM

Over the weekend, I went to one of the most beautiful weddings I’ve ever attended. My husband was one of the wedding party and while we traveled a little ways to be there, we likely did not travel the farthest to be in attendance. We drove about 4 hours on a Friday morning and when we go to the hotel, we were tired, but ready for showers to prepare for the rehearsal.

Prior to getting to the site, I was already aware that there are differences in how Southerners handle weddings than how Northerners do. Etiquette books were consulted and everything was in its proper place. We didn’t have to worry about arranging his suit or hotel. We just needed to get them his measurements and tell them our preferences. Everything was taken care of for us and our stress levels for the wedding were, at most, minimal. We had to be there and be pretty. We can handle being pretty.

When we got to the hotel, and walked in the door, it was clear that we were in the most beautiful suite the hotel had to offer and that our hosts had taken care to make sure our needs would be met while we were there for the wedding. A small basket was on the table and filled to the brim with goodies, including bug spray (this is in a town known for mosquitos the size of small bats), as well as drinks and snacks. There were Legos for A.J., soft cashmere socks for me and BBQ seasoning for Leon as well as other thoughtful items to make us feel treasured. It worked. I rolled on the bed like a true rags to riches hick and then jumped up to flat iron my frizzy hair that, due to humidity, made me look like a troll doll.

At the rehearsal, the first question out of the bride’s mouth, after greeting me, was “How was your room? Is it ok? Everything alright with it?” Are you kidding me? There is not a thing in the world wrong with that palace! I grinned and hugged and told her no and, to myself, thought it was especially sweet-natured of her to be worried about us and our comfort on the night before her wedding.

But, what I realized is that this is just how people roll in the South. The bride wouldn’t dream of NOT thinking of us and our comfort because it wasn’t just her wedding. It was her chance to spend time with us and make us honored guests at her wedding. It was a chance to be a hostess as well as a princess for a day and it’s not something I feel like I can adequately communicate unless you see it for yourself.

Famous Southern hospitality is not something women in the South are born with, rather it is bred every single day of their lives. Class isn’t something you buy, it’s something that parents give you and teach you as you age and I have been privileged to see how it is done here in the South. That doesn’t mean I have it–far from it–but I’ve been able to see how it’s done and if I ever have a girl, I might be able to give her a little of it.

The bride and her family have it and besides being a beautiful event that reminded me of how special marriage is beyond just a ceremony, I will remember the lovely way we were treated and how we felt to be a part of their day. Did I mention that we were there because my husband is close friends with the groom?

That’s just how they roll.