Already, I’ve had the fantasy about his wedding and it’s not a pretty picture for me. It starts with me bawling throughout the ceremony, objecting that she’s not good enough (though she’s going to be a peach, if his tastes now are to remain the same) and ends with me attached to his legs and him dragging me down the aisle with them–him trying to kick me off like an uber-friendly dog who thinks he wants to be frisky.

No. It’s not pretty.

So, when I make comments about ways I think parents might consider allowing children to grow up, just a little bit, believe me when I say “I get it.” You don’t want your baby growing up too fast. However, there are some things in life that are too cruel to allow, even when you want that small bit of control and forcing your child to have a unibrow because it’s “too grown up” to fix it, isn’t kind. I’m talking to you, Madonna. I’m talking to my own mother, MOM. And I’m talking to every mom out there that thinks their baby looks cute when their baby looks like a yeti. It’s not funny. It’s not nice. And it’s not winning them friends or helping them socialize.

At 20-something, I deal with the small animal on my forehead every 2-3 weeks. Mine needs to be taken care of right now and while my personal grooming isn’t your business, I want you to know that this plea for help is a personal one. I remember, vaguely, children making fun of my unibrow as I was growing up. My repressed memories will only let so much come back to me, bless their hearts. What’s scary about this is that I didn’t understand what the problem was. I didn’t realize that my brows were an issue or why. To say I was sheltered was an understatement.

I grew up on a farm and it’s not like anyone ever said “Your brows are nas-tay!” When we moved, puberty frowned further on me and it all went downhill. Part of being a parent is helping to properly socialize our children. If you are down with the naturalistic approach, that’s cool. At least educate your child as to what is happening and allow them the choice. If you want to be in charge and say “No, I’m not going to allow it” that’s cool, too. Explain what’s happening, explain why you aren’t allowing it and allow your kid to have their say. And listen to it and consider it. If you still feel the same, explain that, too.

It’s not often I give advice, but as an adult who lived it, take it from the yeti: if our childhood has to be more complicated because of a decision you make, at least let us understand why.